North Carolina is Scary

I'm spending Christmas with friends in North Carolina.  I met a weird chick at the house here who has the most cross-eyed expression I've ever seen.  Kind of gives me the creeps.  I may be googly-eyed, but at least I'm not cross-eyed like Saucy here.  And what kind of name is Saucy?  And look at her puffy cheeks.  Somebody ought to tell her about the Atkins diet.